Amanda has been doing such a great job posting that I didn't want to come on here and make a mess of it, but it's long over-due. To this point, I've really been trying to keep my excitement level from going too crazy as I stayed cautiously optimistic that everything is progressing with Mya the way that it should....not to mention the fact that I'm scared to death that I'm really going to suck at this whole being a dad thing....that still sounds so strange when I refer to myself as being a dad. That's going to take some time for me to be able to say without getting lite-headed, especially since we're having a little girl who may very well come out and be exactly like her mother :-)
The reality of it all is starting to sink in more and more with each visit to the doctor and it is absolutely amazing to see how much she has grown and developed from the beginning to now.....She's starting to look like a little person!!!!
This experience has been such a whirlwind so far and it's only week 18!! Between getting ready to move in two weeks, grad school beating me up, and all the rest of the madness of summer I haven't really been able to focus on what we're getting ourselves into. I've seen so many other people have kids and thought "how and why would anyone do that to themselves?"....and then I had my first dream about her the other night and it all made perfect sense to me. I was laying on the couch watching TV and she was asleep on my chest. I picked her up just so that I could look at her, I smiled and put her back on my chest. That was it...not very long or in depth but it was the most awesome feeling and I can't wait to do it for real!!!
I am a blubbering mess reading your post babe. I love you so much and know you are going to be the best daddy in the world. I could not imagine taking this journey with anyone but you. Hell I probably wouldn't if you hadn't come into my life. I know you have been insanely overwhelmed with life this last year but I want you remember that I am so proud of you and know you are working hard for our family. I may not tell you enough how much I appreciate you but please know that I do and I couldn't do this without you! It seems like this has been our motto "In a few more months". But it’s true, every year we have set goals and together we have accomplished every single one of these goals. Maybe at a tortoise pace but we are doing it while loving each other and growing together. My life has been speckled with bouts of horrid luck but I think all that was righted when I was lucky enough to find love and partnership in you. I truly believe I am a strong person but I am even stronger with you by my side.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what I am excited about more, meeting Mya or watching you be a daddy! This is going to be the most amazing time in my life and I am scared to death but so dam excited! I LOVE YOU BABE AND I CAN'T IMAGINE MY LIFE WITHOUT YOU! XOXO